ELDORADO—We learned last week that Eldorado’s favorite disease (Freeman Shannon Todd Deuel, police chief of Eldorado, aka STD), is a lil upset.
We are hearing that he’s upset that we found out that he’s married.
Now, WHY he would be so upset about such a thing is a matter that’s completely beyond us; we haven’t been able to get an answer to that crucial question.
However, we do know that according to many close to him, STD has been raging and bulling up over having had his nuptials announced on our website right here…even though his young bride, Blair “badge bunny” Baker (roughly half his age) put it right on her Facebook for all the world to see…You know, Freeman….that word “world” in “worldwideweb”? That means EVERYBODY. Doesn’t matter that she has it set to private….we can STILL SEE THE PART OF IT where she’s changed her status to “married.” Did you expect her to keep it a SECRET?
Mrs. & Mr. STD
Wonder what he’s trying to hide about this?
Our sources close to STD have advised us that he’s REALLY raising hell, exploding into profanities at inopportune moments, throwing things, generally pitching a fit, albeit periodically (you know, between being a police chief and being a federal marshal at the district court in Benton…when he’s not traveling to Cape Girardeau for dietary purposes).
This report may make him step up his game.
Oh well.
Our prediction: either his hissy fits (or lack of hair) will send her running back to wherever she came from; or her proclivity toward cop-flavor-of-the-year will drive the lovely couple apart…in a short amount of time. She’s a very unlikely candidate for any kind of long-term commitment, and, well….so is he, as the record shows. And then factor in the matter of childless-biological-clock-is-ticking Blair having hooked up with a guy who’s shooting blanks….& this is just a recipe for disaster. Either way you look at it, actually.
Whatever happens, we’ll keep you posted on the latest.