RICHLAND CO., Ill.—It’s been awhile since we’ve had something absolutely incomprehensible to bring to you about a reader complaint…but last week, we had a doozey.
We received word from a particular person (can’t really qualify as a reader, but it’s nigh near impossible to qualify this whole thing anyway…) that her daughter has a lawyer and is going to sue us because of a headline. Considering the amount of stress we’ve been under while producing the last three issues, when I responded to her messages, I seriously just didn’t remember the article at all, and merely told the complainant that if we put it in an article, guaranteed it was in a police report, as shown here thusly:
Nov 18th, 9:53am
You need to check your sources a little better. ..your title
Nov 18th, 9:58am
About my daughter Rachel. Pennington. She did not have her kid with her i am her mother. My grandson was at school. …you want truth call 618 204 1202. ..also putting stuff up like this hirts family members especially her son my other two kids getting threats why lie about her that’s wrong. ..,if a certain family that introduced drugs to my kid she wouldn’t be that way wow …
Nov 18th, 10:12am
Can’t reply
Disclosure NewsMagazine Monthly
Nov 18th, 1:18pm
All we can print is what comes from police reports. You might want to get ahold of Rachel’s if you have a disagreement with what they say.
Now. Bear in mind that because of her stilted and disjointed way of introducing me to her complaint, I didn’t really catch what she was saying; she was referring to a headline as a ‘title.’ But…remember. Uber stress on the Disclosure front here. I literally couldn’t remember writing anything about a Rachel Pennington. So I just told Tawney-mom what’s above this graph: if it was in the report, that’s what we wrote.
The convo carried on thusly:
Nov 18th, 1:24pm
Oh ya really the police report does not say her child was there in fact he was at school all it was probation came do a drug test with a drug cop
Nov 18th, 1:24pm
Get your factsstraight
Nov 18th, 1:24pm
Get your facts straight
Disclosure NewsMagazine Monthly
Nov 18th, 9:50pm
Have you SEEN the police report? Because I’m guaranteeing you, if it’s in the article, it’s in the court file. Maybe YOU should get YOUR facts straight, and bitch at the correct people, which under the circumstances would be the cops and courts, NOT. US.
Nov 18th, 10:03pm
Im getting a lawyer that’s. It mt daughter is pissed she is sending. Me her charges you best believe. Im getting a lawyer
From Tawney Pfeifer’s Facebook page. We can’t say this is her…but the family resemblances are there. Except, of course, for the friggin snakebites or whatever they’re called.
After that one (we get that a lot, and we wish we had literally a nickel for every single such threat since we began in 2003; we’d be filthy freaking rich and wouldn’t have to be doing a paper every three weeks from now until eternity), I just told her to have fun, and that whatever attorney her daughter sought to sic on us will likely tell her “be glad they spelled her name right.”
The next day, however (when we weren’t on the road and I wouldn’t have been able to do it anyway because I don’t internet-&-drive), I did the understandable thing and ran “Rachel Pennington” through the search engine, and lo and behold found her name, coming out of a Richland County article in this month’s (November) print edition. The Pennington mention was unrelated to the headline, which was “Children found at scene of drug bust,” for those who are wondering. I remembered writing that, and putting the whole thing together. I did it the traditional way I put an article together when there are multiple stories of like crimes (which we categorize as drug crimes, crimes of violence. crimes against persons/property that aren’t necessarily violence-involved, sex crimes, then random.) This was under the drug crimes gathering for Richland (which we always have a lot of.) And here, as a sort of Read the Lead, you can find the solution to the entire mystery:
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RICHLAND CO.— Authorities say when they went to serve a search warrant at an East Franklin Street, Olney, home they found a gun safe with thousands of dollars in it, drugs…and three minor children in the residence.
After narrowly escaping drug convictions from 2002, Kenneth Edward Lynch, 52, and Carrie Ann Murray, 36, both of 205 East Franklin St., Olney, have been charged with one count of Unlawful Possession of Methamphetamine.
Authorities say that on Sept. 24, while at their home on Franklin Street, Lynch and Murray possessed 5-15 grams of meth.
Lynch was busted in 2002 and charged with two counts of Unlawful Possession of Methamphetamine Manufacturing Materials one for 15-30 grams and the second for 30-150 grams, two counts of Unlawful Possession of a Controlled Substance (prescription medication) and one count of Unlawful Possession of Methamphetamine 15-100 grams.
All charges were dismissed.
The discovery of meth was made when Richland County Deputy Kevin McCormick arrived at the house to execute a search warrant.
The deputy found the drugs, drug paraphernalia, and a gun safe containing guns and $18,000 in cash.
There were also three children present in the home, ages 3, 6 and 12 years.
At the time of her arrest, Murray was out on bond from a April drug case in which she is charged with Unlawful Possession of Methamphetamine less than five grams.
The cash bond in Lynch’s most recent case has been set at $20,000.
Cash bond in Murray’s case has been set at $5,000.
Convicted doper arrested again days after sentencing
In an unrelated case, Rachel C. Pennington, 20, of 201 West Mack Ave., Apt. 2, Olney, was sentenced Oct. 9 after pleading guilty to 
one count of Unlawful Possession of a Controlled Substance, admitting that on Oct. 5, while at Wal-Mart, located at 1001 North West St., Olney, she had on her person alprazolam.
In return for cutting a deal with state’s attorney David Hyde, Pennington was sentenced to 24 months probation and ordered to pay $3,207 in fines and fees.
Hyde is notorious for worrying more about bringing cash into county coffers than he is about getting dopers either the help they need or off the…
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You can read the rest of the article by clicking this link. It is a Read the Lead, after all, and so I don’t want to produce any more of the article here because, you know….bills.
But as you can see, there’s a little distinction here.
The fact that the headline (‘title,’ if you’re a Tawney) had to do with the first subhead in the article is, apparently, her gripe….even though she apparently didn’t really read the article, just saw the headline and totally, completely, overwhelmingly MISSED the first few words of the next subhead, “In an unrelated case,” leading into her kid’s portion of the article…which is, incidentally, a typical way to manage the storyload when you’re grouping dope crimes but have limited space for a headline (First-World Problems, I know.)
When I saw this, I laughed for a solid three to four minutes. Then I thought to myself, “Self, you probably should message Tawney back and tell her she missed the obvious.” And then I thought, “Self, it’s been a really slow damn news weekend, and maybe the readers would get a kick out of the whole debacle.” Except, of course, for Tawney and her ilk. They’re going to be pissed. But…enlightened.
So here is your enlightenment: Be sure you know what you’re griping about. The photo of Ms. Snakebite up there was set VERY CAREFULLY in the subhead in which her article was outlined. You can’t just headline everything; the headline would be bigger than the article itself, so we do what we have to do. Apparently, some people just don’t understand that.
Oh and by the way…Ms. Pennington has new charges, which will be outlined in the upcoming (December 2014) edition. It’s on stands a week from Tuesday/Wednesday, December 2/3. Be watching.